Showing posts with label dnd. Show all posts
Showing posts with label dnd. Show all posts

Monday, July 13, 2026

Summer Games, by Request!

Some of my co-workers asked if I would run some games this summer, and who am I to pass up an opportunity to have my fragile ego stoked?!

So this summer, I am running another series of one(ish)-shots for some coworkers and their families.  The ruleset we are using is ye olde Moldvay Basic, because I own 4 copies of the book (yet only 1 copy of Cook Expert).  Table Rules come from this lovely download from Technical Grimoire - a great site.


We played our first session of Hole in the Oak Thursday night, and it was every bit as fun as the various reviews promised.  There will be spoilers in these session logs for those who have somehow missed this adventure since it was first released in 2019.  You have been warned!


Our PCs - a circle of friends and acquaintances from the outlying areas of Skara Brae: 

Gil, Fighter, deceased

Calicar, Magic-User, deceased

Ro-Ro (and Leonardo, her inner monologue), Halfling, deceased

Armina Ironfist, Dwarf

Lyrial, Elf

MacDuff, Fighter

Victor, Fighter (Gil's replacement)

Wo-Wo, Halfling (Ro-Ro's replacement)

Galicar, Magic-User (Calicar's replacement)

Shorny - charmed sheep-headed faun minion of Lyrial

My players have a mix of 5e, 3.x, and no experience, with the exception of Ro-Ro's player, who played a similar halfling with a similar name a few summers back - she said she has a type and I am not to judge her.

I am disappointed in myself as DM because I failed to make any Shakespeare references about MacDuff.  Next session, though, I am prepared!

The only houserule we used this session was the Big d30 - where each player (NOT PC) gets to substitute a d30 for another die - in tonight's case it was entirely for damage.  More on this later.

Next week, I plan on introducing Trollsmythe's Shields Shall Be Splintered rule.  Note that link travels into the distant past, all the way to 2008.  I feel old.

This explains my dotage.

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The session kicked off with the PCs gathered around the titular oak, staring at the hole. After trading rumors, they tied a rope to Ro-Ro and bravely let her poke her head and lantern into the hole to see what is what.  Declaring it safe, our intrepid explorers descended - each rolling to see if they fell, but all kept their grip on the notoriously loosely seated tree roots.  Once on the bottom, they observed a mix of boot and hoof prints in the sand.  They also saw that someone had carved NOLLY'S KINGDOM one a particularly thick root.  After some brief discussion about who Nolly might be, they moved forward.

DM Note: the rumors they started with drove much of the role-playing the rest of the game - if you don't incorporate rumors in your games, you totally should!  The rumors they heard involved a slave-keeping mutant ogre, delectable night-tomatoes, a water dragon, and something that I forget.  Sorry.  Note to self - take better notes (I had a pencil and should have just checked the rumors each PC heard).

Reaching an intersection, the band made use of Lyrial's and Armina's infravision and headed towards the warmth (in contrast to the sound of water or wind), finding slowly writhing roots blocking their path, but also able to see that after a bit, the path opens up and continued.

After some debate, the group attached a lantern to a 10' pole using rope and an iron spike, thrusting it into the roots.  The roots replied by yanking the pole from the hands of Arminia, pulling it into the soft earthen walls the roots spring from.  The PCs decided a better plan involved oil and fire, which forced the roots to withdraw into the walls.  DM Note: I guess none of my players have ever cleared brush - a sharp blade (like all the swords the PCs carry) would have forced the roots to retreat quickly.  Xin loi.

Once past these roots, our bold explorers found themselves in a chamber with the walls made up of mossy faces - faces that spoke in unison (and now in stereo!).  The faces spoke the following rhyme:

Give us gold and truth be told/Give us threats, there'll be regrets!

As the faces spoke, roots pushed out from the earthen walls, looking all the world like gnarly hands cupped together - presumably for gold.

After some experimentation, the PCs determined that 5gp buys one piece of information.  26gp later, the PCs learned the following:

A silver sword lies hidden in a pillar of stone.

Do not meddle with the hunter. His presence still haunts these caverns.

The horned ogre owns a treasure whose value he doesn't understand.

The gnomes are guardians of a secret god with great power.

Forgotten treasures lie buried by the river.

No longer willing to spend gold, the PCs forged ahead.

Moving forward, the PCs found themselves in a small chamber with two exits - one leading to an ammonia smell (which kicked off a discussion about what dragons breathe, and then chlorine gas, and then a bit of WW1, but we got back on track) and the other to NOT that smell.   They opted for the no ammonia and found themselves in a curving, cobblestoned path.  Stopping at a series of alcoves, the PCs boldly looted a key from a coat pocket, matching red fezzes, and cut a portrait of a gnome out of its frame.  Note that this portrait led to continuing confusion and jokes about gnomes and halflings and how they are the same, minus shoes.  Ro-Ro was not amused.

The Doctor in a Red Fez!  Just like what our PCs looted discovered!

Looting successful, the PCs found themselves in small chamber featuring a table, stool, and a bell.  They rang the bell (but surprisingly didn't take it).  A distant voice called out, "I'm coming, please wait."

They waited and soon a ram-headed faun appeared, sporting a fancy tweed jacket and majestic curved horns.  MAJESTIC.  He introduced himself as Ramius and offered tea and crumpets. Of course, the PCs followed him deeper into the complex, ending in a kitchen. 

Waiting in the kitchen were Ramius's two wives: Docile Ewely in a polka-dot dress and matching hair bow, and suspicious Shorny in a black lace dress.   The PCs sat down around the kitchen table and at Ramius's request, his wives brought tea and crumpets, alongside the finest cream and butter made from sheep's milk.  The FINEST, I tell you!

The only PC that took the bait drank the tea was Arminia, who made her save and didn't fall asleep.  Visibly frustrated, Ramius excused himself to get 'something awesome' and then returned with FOUR rune-carved sheep skulls with wickedly barbed horns floating above him.

Of course, they attacked, but the PCs won the initiative (by 1 point on the die) and were able to dispatch Ramius before he could connect.  His skulls, though, wreaked havoc.  One skull, in particular crushed the chests of Calibar, Ro-Ro, and then Gil before Lyrial charmed Shorny, who in turn called back the surviving skull (DM Note - that skull leveled up).

The battle itself was a slugfest, with MANY misses and deaths before Lyrial decided her spell was mightier than her sword.  

Blank-faced Shorny called back the sole skull, then revealed (under questioning) that Ramius's corpse held a key to the larder in the bedroom.  Some of the PCs followed the cobblestones back to a room featuring a bed large enough for three AND a massive chest.  Opening up the chest revealed a variety of loot, some recently butchered (human) meat, and - most importantly - three living humanoids that were bound, gagged, and wearing naught but loincloths.

DM Note: Surprisingly, no gimp, BDSM, or generic Pulp Fiction jokes were made.  The DM may need to turn in his game-master card....

While the others were looting the larder, MacDuff ripped a horn from Ramius's head, in order to make a shofar.  There is no way that this shofar won't end up with some interesting magical quirks, given its origin. 

A variety of shofars.  No doubt the silver-chased and the enameled ones are magical items.

The mostly nekkid replacement PCs were busy stripping the fresh corpses of Ro-Ro, Gil, and Calicar when the bell rang.

Shorny was sent to check on things, and then returned with a Gnome trading party in tow.

DM note: Voicing sheep (and goat) people is fun, because I am not ba-a-a-a-a-ad at it.  My favorite example came after the PCs slew Ramius, then Ewely and Shorny made their morale check and cried out in unison, "you ba-a-a-a-a-a-astards!"  Because there is no more appropriate response in such a situation.

DM note 2: while the PCs ended up with the sleeping herbs for sleepy tea (now known as roofies), they missed the hidden potion and cookbooks.  Alas....)


Go watch this Twilight Zone episode.  Despite my spoiling it!

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Gnomes

The Gnome trader took in the carnage in the kitchen, particularly the blood-spattered 'heroes' sitting casually around the kitchen table.  After a moment, he then offered to trade something good for the bodies. 

Good being a magical sword.  A magical sword in the possession of a terrible ogre - the same ogre the PCs had heard rumors of.  Those same rumors suggested the ogre was a slaver, and that (plus bloodlust, who are we kidding) was enough for the PCs to agree to follow the Gnome body train (two gnomes to each corpse) back to the Gnome headquarters.

Once there, the PCs met King Grimm and Witch Gribbl of the Gnomes.  Gribbl charmed MacDuff, and he followed her behind the curtain, where he got into a shouting match and then a fight with an Evil Tree Stump god.  With that door open, everyone in the throne room could hear the exchange, and Galicar charmed the King Grimm before the king could force an issue with his troops.

Heading behind the curtain to help MacDuff, Galicar pledged himself to Evil Tree Stump god.  In return, ETS commanded Galicar to kill MacDuff.  As might be imagined, things got complicated as players tried to follow the charms while minimizing how much damage they might do to fellow PCs.

Ultimately, it was a great time as players tried to keep each other in the game without breaking the story of the game (all the charms).

In the end, the solution (besides a high damage axe attack) was placing a glass vial of lantern oil in the sole remaining skull and forcing it to slam into ETS.  It hit, and the oil went everywhere.  Lighting it was a challenge, due to all the single digit attack rolls trying it.  Finally, Wo-Wo fired a crossbow using a d30 for damage, shattering the oil-soaked skull over the oil-soaked ETS with a flaming crossbow bolt.

So, ultimately, setting things on fire IS the solution to problems.

Their god slain, the Gnomes offered a bedroom to rest in.  MacDuff was excited until he learned that a 'full rest' doesn't heal all HP.  Still, 1 hp is better than 0 hp.  

We ended for the night at this point.  

DM note: these Gnomes whistle a marching song that sounds suspiciously like the Seven Dwarves "hi-ho" song.  The Gnomes also have a certain cartoon mouse's verbal tic of going "huh-huh".  This was a good idea at the time, and is now canon in my world.  Blasted Gnomes.

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Ultimately, MacDuff's player was most happy to leap from his chair and act out whatever his fighter was up to - typically killing or fighting something.   If I could hand out MVP xp, it might be to him.  

Everyone laughed lots and are eager for this week's session - an ogre is definitely in the offing, and we shall see what else they get up to (without revealing spoilers).

I am certainly happy that we are playing this summer - it's the joy I didn't know I needed.

Saturday, February 21, 2026

Propping Up Your Game with Maps

It's been a while since my last post - where I ambitiously declared I'd not only post thrice a month, but also that I would publish something by year's end.  That plan failed miserably, as public declarations tend to do.  So we'll see how many posts I write before falling off the blogging wagon again.

As it happens, the Blog of Forlorn Encystment, and through there, Prismatic Wasteland, are welcoming bloggers to join them on the writing-about-maps bandwagon.  So this is a good enough reason for me to write again.

Much like our favorite Hobbit, I do love maps.

"Oh, I do love maps.  I have quite a collection of them!" - Bilbo Baggins, according to the 1977 Rankin-Bass TV movie The Hobbit.

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While online games have their place and purpose, by their nature they prevent the use of tangible props that players can hold and feel and manipulate (and taste and smell and break).  My favorite prop at the table is maps.  (My second favorite is scrolls in general, as both scrolls and maps look the same until unrolled and read.)  

Unrolled maps are examined by all players (and presumably PCs) and provide not only directions to new treasures and locations, but are an efficient means to loredump on your group without boring them to tears with 30 minutes of read aloud box text.

In theory, these at-table props can be elaborate and represent hours of work using fancy inks and fonts and artificially aging paper using coffee and heat (mine aren't) or just hasty markings with enough color, symbols, and words (my maps) to get the party to seriously consider heading that direction as soon as possible (but preferably not until next session, so I have time to better prepare the following of said map).

Regardless of what the actual prop looks like, players love them.  So before your next in-person session, I recommend you grab some paper, sketch a map, roll or fold it up, and hand it to the players the next time one of them searches a body, book, or box.

Watch their eyes light up and your game-world expand with a simple sheet of paper. 

Even if PC curiosity won't get them moving, player curiosity will.  As RPGs are games for players and not PCs, take advantage of this meta curiosity and use maps.

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A cursory search on YouTube found several videos on how to make fancy maps for table props.  Maybe I should take the hint and make a proper map instead of crayons on printer paper the next time we play.


Thursday, July 31, 2025

Advancing NPC Parties

Many DMs add NPC Adventuring Party to their Random Encounter tables or deliberately add them as rivals/allies/enemies/all of the above to specific adventures and/or campaigns, because recurring NPCs are often a good thing.

Truly recurring NPCs tend to be leveled by DM fiat, but not everyone wants or needs that in their games.

I know I don't.

So here is a 2d6 table for us all.  NPCs are PC-equivalent adventurers and retainers are their hirelings and henchmen.


* Casualties are probably dead, but could also be captured, stoned, missing, turned, cursed, quit, fired, retired, or otherwise not returning.  Whether or not any casualties are recovered falls under DM fiat, although recovering said casualties makes for a solid adventure for PCs seeking a purpose.  

** Magic items can be permanent, single-use, or charged. 

*** Magic items are lost through use, destruction, or actually being lost (to bribery, capture, whatever). These latter are potentially recoverable.

**** Monetary rewards is straight cash value of coinage, gems, jewelry, and art objects.

***** Non-magic, non-monetary rewards are statues, lands, titles, marriages, favors, trade goods, etc.

****** One or more NPCs and retainers gain a level, which ones are DM fiat.

******* I highly recommend using Hobgoblinry's Last Lantern-bearer mechanic for your games.

Art by David A. Trampier - I believe from the AD&D DMG or PHB

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This table is inspired in part by Battletech's lifepath tables.  

Reading through the list suggests a high-magic world, which is kind of true for me.  That said, most of the permanent (and many non-permanent) magic items in my games tend to be double-edged, bringing quirks, flaws, and imperfections along with the useful abilities, so I don't mind more magic items in the game world.

Especially when the PCs get ahold of them, because such items make most players think before using them.

 

Saturday, July 5, 2025

Arik of the Hundred Eyes

Arik of the Hundred Eyes is an Immortal who shows up in a passing reference in the adventure B3: Palace of the Silver Princess.  The Vaults of Pandius write-up hits the highlights, which are not many.

Official information:

Arik - Celestial, sphere of Entropy, imprisoned for unspecified crimes heinous enough to get him locked away from the multiverse for eternity. Banished to a prison dimension, he seeks ways to return to the multiverse. (B3, WotI)

Arik uses giant rubies the size of a large man's fist as his eyes - the Hundred Eyes in his tile. These are detachable at will, and function as conduits for the Immortal's power. This conduit functions across dimensions and allows Arik to wield Immortal-level power in a location without being actually present.

His clerics customarily wear blood-red robes with hoods hiding their faces, decorated with a hundred eyes - wearing plate mail underneath. All carry shields with his symbol - a single large red eye.

Kobolds and orcs are attracted to his service, and he has some influence over minor undead like skeletons.

And that's it.

There are other versions of Arik, such as those here, here, and here on page 23 of the Codex Immortalis.

(As an aside, The Vaults of Pandius have - and continue to provide - an excellent overview of all things Mystara-related.  If you are curious about what a proper fan-base supported game world looks like, look no further than the Vaults of Pandius.  Adventures, resources, the Threshold e-zine, and more make for a richer game world.)

Presuming that all of Arik's Eyes appear as large rubies, it becomes simple to find and place them elsewhere, like in the Shrine of Evil Chaos in B2: Keep on the Borderlands.  Specifically, in room 58. 

At the western end of the temple area is a dais of black stone, with four lesser chairs on its lower tier and a great throne above.  The chairs are of bone; the ivory throne is set with gold and adorned with gems of red and black (10 black stones each worth 100 gold pieces, 10 red stones each worth 500 gold pieces, and one large red stone worth 1,000 g.p.).

In my games, that large red stone is an Eye of Arik, and is what draws the monsters to the Caves of Chaos, just like in B3.  Just describe it as pulsing with light - a red strobe light that pulses faster or slower depending on circumstances.

Furthermore, I extrapolated that while officially his eye attracts orcs and kobolds, other Eyes may do other things, or many other things, in addition to or instead of attracting orcs and kobolds.

But rather than list out the 100 Eyes, a random table seems more fitting, so I present 12 powers an Eye of Arik might provide its wielder.

The ruby-red forcefield that features in B3 is powered by DM-fiat, so is not included in this list.


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1 - summons giants (hill, frost, fire, stone - storm hear but can ignore the summons) and giant-kin (ogres, trolls, cyclops); their collective appetite soon strips the land.  (note that Against the Giants: The Liberation of Geoff might provide solid inspiration regarding what this looks like).

2 - summons corporeal undead who move towards the location regardless of time of day and weather; all that die in its glow reanimate as 1-3: zombies, 4-5: ghouls, 6: wights; wielder becomes an incorporeal undead when slain, bound to the gem. 1-2 wraith, 3-4 ghost, 5-6 spectre.

3 - this eye pulses raw arcane power, tinting everything in shades of red and transforming normal creatures into monstrous beasts and abominations that rage and feast darkly in the area.

4 - plant life grows riotous and verdant, becoming alive, sentient, malicious, and hungry.  The various plant monsters begin sprouting; the wielder quickly turns into a black hag that can control it all.

5 - troglodytes creep and tunnel towards the gem, worshipping the wielder (who in turn transforms into a giant frog-thing).

6 - summons beastmen (pig-head orcs, kobolds, gnolls, minotaurs, etc) to serve; the wielder becomes a beast-king (hill giant stats with the head of a lion).

7 - summons goblins, hobgoblins, bugbears and wolves (wargs); thouls often slip in with the hobgoblins and act as enforcers; the wielder's skin peels away to reveal a hobgoblin underneath and reigns as a potent goblin king.

8 - pulses after specific rituals (Arik winks the eye) and humans in the light transform into 1-4: wererats, 5-6 werewolves; orcs become wereboars.  Clerics of Arik become Devil Swine.

9 - magic warps the area, granting spell-like abilities to creatures normally without, spawning living spells that drift about wanting to be cast, awakening the spells of spellcasters in the area (these spells demand to be cast and on a failed save by the caster, will be cast), and clouds of wild magic that drift on the wind, changing (and infecting) magic used and encountered.  (DM Note: this could be an excuse to change rulesets in a campaign).

10 - raw magic permeates the area, animating objects and twisting insects and animals into giant and mutant versions of themselves.  As might be imagined, they are ravenous.

11 - inspires dragonlust for gold and hoarding; gold sickness; transforms beings of sufficient greed and power into red dragons

12 - calls Chaotic dragons to it, but mostly reds (but also black and green); dragons that sleep and bask in its glow grow more powerful in time (maxing out HP and other die rolls).

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The various monsters all come from the Rules Cyclopedia - originals are a fortune, but pdfs and POD hardbacks are quite affordable - and is a great example of what a one-book game should look like.

Anyhow, since so many of these options attract some type of nasty to it, it stands to reason that dungeon-building magic-users would be interested in acquiring one (or more) Eyes of Arik.  Given the potential power of magic-users in Mystara (level 36!), Arik doesn't mind his Eyes being used in this way and might even send his clerics as emissaries to magic-users with domains in order to "gift" them with an Eye for their dungeon.  

Maybe this time, the cultists will succeed in recruiting someone capable and willing to free Arik from the prison dimension! 

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Given the trouble that Eyes of Arik cause, destroying or containing one is a noble quest for heroic (or at least pragmatic) adventurers.

By way of example, the Eye of Arik in B3 (green cover) provides several specific methods:

The ruby can only be destroyed in three ways: (1) Three particular notes played on the Ice Harp will shatter the ruby.  (2) If the party brings two (or more) statuettes of the silver dragon into the room, the dragon Ariksbane will be freed from the Dimension of Ice.  The dragon's breath will disintegrate the ruby (without harming anything else in the room). (3) If some character touches the ruby Sword of Arik to the ruby Eye of Arik, both will crumble into worthless powder.  

Following the example of B3 suggests that each Eye's destruction requires significant effort, even if Ariksbane and the Ice Harp exist in your world, because they would still need finding. 

Saturday, March 1, 2025

RPG Carnival: Dragon Neighbors

The current RPG Blog Carnival is hosted by Sea of Stars and involves Dragon Neighbors. 


It stands to reason that having one or more dragons for neighbors makes people smart, tough, subservient, or dead.  Maybe all four.

Still, dragons are sentient (at least in most game worlds, and certainly in mine), which means they might be reasoned with, should the right negotiator be available, and the right terms struck.  After all, dragons understand that sometimes there are better options than naked aggression and extreme violence (too bad most PCs never figure that one out).

Barring deliberate killing, dragons can live for centuries, if not millenia, which is more than enough time to engage in the same pastime of many elves: breeding the perfect human, much like how humans do the same with dogs, horses, and other animals.

While I have written about this topic before as a thought experiment, here it is better fleshed out.

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What this means in practicality is that the Elves, specifically the elf mage-king Lathril of the Gilt-Leaf, made a bet with the Dragon Mage Intet, the Dreamer that they could breed a more perfect champion than the dragon could.  Winner gets control of the continent, loser publicly accepts defeat and leaves the area.  Until the bet reaches a conclusion, all open hostilities are ceased.

To make it interesting, other near-immortal beings were also invited to the table: lichlords, vampire mages, lesser extraplanar beings, fey nobles, other dragons, other elves, and at least one sphinx. 

(These gatherings of near-immortals can be contentious but serve to alleviate the boredom of ages that result in them succumbing to torpor and eventually fatal ennui.  While these near-immortals unlikely to admit it, after a few centuries, they look forward to these gatherings.)

The terms of the bet are simple: each bettor has seven centuries to breed the best human champion.  There are other details regarding particulars, but that is the gist of the bet. 

Dius Fidus, the deity of contracts, oaths, and deals, presided over the final signing of the contract, using the same type of contract materials that fiends use to guarantee mortal souls.



Each of the Elves believes they will win, as this is akin to how they create other elves, merely over centuries and with the endstate being someone that is still human.  All of the other bettors believe that they will win, because they believe they are better than Elves. 

Of course, the Dragon Mage Intet will win, because they plan to cheat as needed.

At least, that is their plan.  Other champions that prove more competent than theirs will throw a wrench into the works.  

As will other participants cheating just as much.

After all, with fey and fiends at the contracting table, lots of loopholes based on wordplay, denotation, and connotation were included in the final contract for the express purpose of trying to cheat to victory.

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In the early centuries of the bet, champion bloodlines would be guided to attack others, seemingly by fate more than direct guidance.  But after several centuries, the bettors have lost track of one another's bloodlines, so it is almost inevitable that some become allies, or at least nonaggressors.

Even the dullest among the bettors understands that it is not just genetics, but life experiences that shape a human.  So each of them ensures that there are plenty of physical, mental, and social challenges to forge their bloodlines into the best they can be.  Unfortunately, most of the bettors consider traumatic experiences to be learning opportunities, so those are the lion's share of the challenges.

As the goal is a champion that is likely to see combat and death, having the wildlands be wild actually helps immensely, so all bettors have a vested interest in ensuring that the area doesn't become too settled.  As such, the wildlands around Skara Brae teem with all sorts of trouble for the beleaguered port city, to include the ruins of past would-be conquerors who failed in their efforts to tame the land.

The bet requires a cessation of direct attempts to conquer the continent, but nothing about hostile beings making their lairs in the area.  Besides, these creatures (un)wittingly help shape the various champions that the bettors have been breeding.  Intet itself has ensured that some of its 'children' reside near enough to participate in the forging of this champion, and while it has favorites, it will not go out of its way to assist any of them.

This bet is the reason that Skara Brae's history is one of fire and bloodshed, but also resilience and perseverance.  

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The timeline of the bet grows to an end, and as I type this, the champions of the various bloodlines converge on the city of Skara Brae, where they will unwittingly compete to determine just which champion is, in fact, superior.

Once that is decided, the winner of the bet will claim the continent, and open war will likely break out, as most bettors have no intention of honoring the deal. 

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In short, dragons, much like elves, are jerks.


Thursday, February 27, 2025

Quantum Everything

Part of PC creation is determining languages known, skills known, and spells known.

In the interest of faster PC creation and in the interest of player choices not being wasted, I started using Quantum rules for these options.

By this, I mean I do not require the players to choose these things before the game starts, but rather they declare them and fill in the blanks on their character sheet as the game progresses.  This not only feeds into the emergent stories that I prefer, but it also guarantees that players make useful choices.

As a bonus to me, the DM, it means I don't have to be overly concerned with adventure contents, as odds are good - especially early on - that a player can just declare their PC knows a language, spell, or skill to further the adventure.

For me and my games, this is a fine option.

I will say that part of my job as DM is to remind players that they have X amount of blank spaces left.

These work best with lower-level PCs, but in theory, someone could hold one of those languages until a higher level... but our adventures don't go that high before TPKs with the scheduling beast, so use these with a grain of salt.

And if it turns out that someone else came up with this before me, please tell me, so I can give credit where credit is due.  I have read lots of blog posts over the last decade, and I know I am not smart enough to come up with this in a vacuum.

 

Sunday, October 13, 2024

Summer Games: Session Seven

Even though summer is over and we finally have some blessedly cool weather, I will be calling this the Summer Games until we no longer meet.  My hope is that it lasts until next summer, at least.

Earlier logs: onetwothreefourfive, six.

It has been several weeks since our last session because we're adults.  Still, we finally met and it was both productive and fun.

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Covered in gore, the party wanders the first level, seeking the exit to the surface they know exists.  Perhaps this gore will tempt them to bathe in whatever pools they may discover, regardless of possible consequences.

DM Note - After all, they once heard a rumor about how bathing in a pool changed someone, so odds are good one (or more) will bathe in or drink from discovered pools.  I'll need to have a water feature table ready, if only for inspiration.

Orcs slain, our heroes found themselves at a four-way intersection and opted for the left-hand corridor over the double doors in front of them or the right-hand corridor.  Still, they dithered enough as they scouted down the corridor that a wandering monster appeared.

The PCs heard a chittering sound heading towards them, and while some ducked into a side corridor, TruggleDave stood his ground and readied his bow.  The chittering and skittering grew louder as a long greenish multi-legged horror moved towards them, its many tentacles writhing and dripping, along the ceiling!  DM Note - It turns out that two of the PLAYERS are freaked out by spiders and were visibly moving away from me as I described it heading their way - I need to get with them to see if I need to not use spiders, as we meet rarely enough as it is.  

Dave got off one shot, hitting and rolling max damage, but it wasn't nearly enough to slay the carrion crawler!  It closed with him, hitting with multiple tentacles, paralyzing Dave (for 12 turns) in mid-shot, leaving him looking like an awkward ugly cupid! 

Initiative was tied, so the other PCs responded as best they could, with Varda casting her lone spell - a Magic Missile that dealt near-max damage, and Brother Frank finishing the beast off with a crushing blow from his mace.  Roro missed, Alistar missed, and Dack the Boar ran about helplessly as he couldn't reach it.

DM Note - I've been wanting to use one of Toren Atkinson's drawings for some time now, so I am thrilled that the random table brought me a hungry Carrion Crawler.


Paralyzed Dave was dragged into the side corridor, itself quickly opening into a room featuring yet more corridors and a fountain in the corner, featuring a mannish-lionish face spewing water into a shallow bowl.  

The PCs then spent some time trying to unparalyze Dave, first by pouring fountain water on him, and then trying to get him to drink said water (neither worked).  Enough time that wandering monsters were indicated, and the party heard what sounded like large doors opening.  Bracing for the worst, they were shocked when a giant face appeared in the opening asking if they wanted the dead Carrion Crawler because "that's good eating with orc sauce."  A goblin joined the ogre, bree-yarking at the party until it was realized that Roro spoke Goblin, then I dropped to English.

The Goblin wanted to verify that his friends (presumably the visible ogre and maybe another making noise in the corridor) named Smash and Grab could have the dead things for a meal.  Satisfied, they dragged the bodies away, and a door was heard to close.

Combat averted, Varda began examining the fountain itself and discovered that the eyes appeared to be buttons of some sort.  Pressing them both dropped a fancy jeweled key out of the fountain's mouth.

Art by Jim Holloway from Dungeon of Dread, pg 79.

As Varda examined, and then pocketed, the key, Roro tossed a coin into the fountain and made a wish for the party to return to the surface. To everyone's amazement, smoke started billowing out of the fountain mouth, quickly taking the shape of a balding, goateed, blue man on top and smoke on bottom.  

He introduced himself as Djinn Carrey (because L1's Djinn Belushi was a dated reference) and after negotiations, the wish was granted - and as the smoke cleared, the party rejoiced because it let them skip the taxman at the main entrance!  At this point, they noticed the shrieks of fright and calls for the guard - Djinn Carrey had teleported them into the center of Skara Brae's market, so our heroes scampered off to the Green Dragon Inn to split loot and bathe.

-----

MVP for the session was TruggleDave for his bold portrayal of a cupid statue for much of the session.  

As DM, I'll let the group know how much they earned and let them split it as they see fit.  Some of them might level up.

Next session will be in Skara Brae, so I need to revise the rumor table, if nothing else.  That said, Frankie Breakbone will likely send an emissary once word is out the PCs have returned.  If they're smart, they'll pay off their debt for some more carousing to continue the cycle!


Sunday, September 22, 2024

Still Contributing

I despair of ever getting to play a seventh session in our summer game.  We've decided on a day (Wednesdays) but have yet to be able to play due to everything else in an adult's life.

Still, I want to write.

Therefore a small post today, inspired by How to Contribute, written by Papers and Pencils (a fine blog worth mining for ideas and downloads). While I am too new to have spent time on Google+, I am old enough to remember people discussing the high-quality discussions and games that went on.

So I try to contribute.  

That said, today I want to talk about others' contributions, specifically the podcast Between Two Cairns.  

I've been listening to it for several weeks now,and have so far successfully made my saves vs. buying the adventures they speak highly of, as well as the other publications they mention in passing (like A Rasp of Sand and The Valley of Flowers, among others).

It's not so much the reviews that pull me in, but the banter and question-answering at the start of each episode.  The hosts, Yochai Gal and Brad Kerr (and occasional guests), engage in wide-ranging conversations in the opening 30-45 minutes, often spurred by whatever question they're answering.  These discussions never fail to keep me entertained, and often have me researching whatever books, blogposts, or names are mentioned.

The reviews themselves are thorough, addressing not only content, but art, layout, and usability.

All that said, give Between Two Cairns a listen.   

Try not to buy anything.




Wednesday, August 14, 2024

Summer Games, Session Six

We got to play again!  We were told our laughter could be heard down the hall through two closed doors, something I consider a win.  Once classes start back up, we may need to tone it down a bit.

Earlier logs are here: onetwothreefour, five.

Summary: met a new NPC, went upstairs, met three more NPCs, then killed them.

-----

Chesire Cat

The party stood in front of a statue of a wizard, right arm extended and hand upright (waiting for a high-five, perhaps), and the left holding a large book, a book that is chained to the statue's waist.

Before the PCs (Varda, mostly, with an assist from Daffyd) could do much investigating, they heard a voice, followed by seeing a smile, then eyes, then the rest of the Chesire Cat appear and a conversation ensued.  The major question asked by the players being "is this the cartoon or live action Chesire Cat?"

Disney's cartoon, of course.


As the Chesire Cat disappeared, it implied it would be watching the party, as they were so very entertaining.

It gone, the PCs got back to the important business of examining the statue and looting it of hidden treasure.

Part of the examination involved high-fiving the statue, so as I held out my hand (roleplaying the statue, naturally) I planned to describe a mild electric shock.  Instead, real life intervened and when our hands touched, there was audible static shock, derailing all of us with laughter.

That done, the PCs determined how to open the cover of the book, which was basically a stone box.  Within it, they found a leather-wrapped candle in the shape of a wizard, with the wick poking out of its pointy hat.

 As they agonized over what to do with the candle, Dave's ring pulsed upon his finger, and he suddenly had the idea that he should light the candle (which he didn't do).  DM note - the ring is a Ring of Uffish Thought, and when the players are dithering, it pulses and the wearer has a DM-provided idea about what to do next; not necessarily THE answer, but a possible answer to their dilemma. There is no requirement they follow through on the idea.

Now possessing a Little Wax Wizard, Varda tucked it away in her pack rather than light it.  It's like the players don't quite trust me! 

Finished with the statue, the explorers moved to the staircase heading up.

But again, failed to search it.

Alas...

-----

Upstairs

At the top of the stairs, the party found themselves on a landing, with a stone wall to their left, a heavy curtain to their right, and another staircase headed down in front of them.  They sent Dack the Boar with Daffyd the head under the curtain as a reconnaissance team of sorts.  Hearing no combat, the rest of the team joined them in a large chamber, with a single large heavy curtain concealing the stairs landing, and a pair of large double doors to the north.

Varda's infravision revealed what appeared to be three moving heat sources on the far side of the door - she could see it through the crack between door bottom and floor.  With this information, the party hatched a plan.

One of many fine minis from Otherworld Miniatures - if I had the money, these are what I would use!

Opening the doors let the PCs, led by Varda, see three pig-head orcs (porcs?).  The orcs, on the other hand, only saw her and a few others (DM note - I didn't consider what the orcs would see with their infravision).  The reaction roll was middling, so the orcs were willing to talk, but since Varda is an elf (whose player doesn't know the lore involving Gruumsh, Corellon, and an eye), they weren't particularly kind.  Negotiations broke down when bribes/tolls were demanded, and the fight was on!

It was a terrible fight, with many rolls on both sides below 8.  Eventually, the PCs prevailed, with Dack the Boar charging the lead orc and knocking it prone and Dave charging a second, grabbing an arrow out of the door (from a botched ranged attack) all Legolas-style and stabbing the orc with it.  Roro finished the prone orc by driving the Cutlass Sierra through its face and head, then spent the rest of the fight throwing brain matter at people.  Varda and Alistar double-teamed an orc, and the last orc standing traded blows for several rounds until Dack put it down.

The orcs passed morale checks throughout, to their demise.

-----

Brains!

The brutal assault on the orcs finished, Roro found herself with a handful of orc-brain left, so she threw it at Brother Frank, rolling a natural 20, which resulted in Frank catching much of it in his mouth, mid-praising Avrae.  This in turn caused Brother Frank to start puking his guts up and our laughter to be heard waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay down the hall. 

After recovering, Brother Frank pointed at Roro and gave her an angry glare.  It's a good thing first- level clerics cannot cast spells in BX, or Roro might have caught one!

While the brains were being thrown about, the orc corpses were looted, using a repurposed random table.  Not much of value was found.

-----

Treasure recovered this session was minimal: the wizard candle, a scroll (actually a map, but they didn't open it), a large full wineskin, and three orc scimitars (Alistar kept one) - I won't be using that random table for loot again.  Maybe I can find that die-drop loot table I printed from Run from Kelvin's Brainsplurge! (Dyson reformatted it) before next session.

MVP for the session was Roro, for the natural 20 when throwing brains at Brother Frank.  We laughed LOTS at that.

Describing what Varda sees with Infravision makes things interesting.  It might be time for me to do research beyond my very fuzzy experience with thermal cameras from years ago.  Thermal cameras are fun - I ended up down a rabbit hole of watching videos of people farting, belching, and peeing through a thermal lens.  Humans generate lots of heat.

I also found this (italics and boldface mine) online, here.  That said, its original source is likely the AD&D DMG: 

"Creatures with infravisual capability of unusual nature, such as those which see infravisually to 90', are actually emitting infrared radiation from their eyes and seeing what is within this visual range by receiving the reflected radiation. Such creatures can easily distinguish floor, ceiling, wall, and other areas, as well as furnishings within an area. The eyes of all such creatures will appear as very brightly glowing red when observed by any other creature with standard infravision. Most monsters inhabiting underground areas will have this form of infravision."

Next time, I will be more deliberate in my use of infravision.

 

Friday, July 19, 2024

Summer Games, Session Five

I think this is the most consistent gaming I have experienced in years.  NOT having alcohol during the game actually makes it better, at least for me.  Who knew?

Earlier logs are here: onetwothree, four

Summary: no deaths, no treasure (beyond a mundane spear), stairs up discovered

-----

We picked up where we left off, in the crypts.  Dave slipped the ring onto his finger, finding that it slipped onto it easily, but then he felt it tighten around the base of his finger.  He has no idea what it yet does, but his gut tells him its magic.

After a brief debate, they checked the crypt across the hall and found it differed substantially from the first three.  Mounted upon the door was a metal plaque (made of orichalcum), with swirling letters that, when they finished swirling, read in a language each could understand (the literate ones and those tall enough to see it, at least):

It would be best

To let them rest

Heed this request

Or become Death's guest

(DM note - I promise my next rhyming riddle will be better.)

After comments about how the lich they suspect is an incarnation of Shel Silverstein, the group opted to skip the remaining three crypts and try the chamber at the end of the hall, so Dave and Daffyd investigated.  (Note that TruggleDave's player is convinced a lich-king is behind all of it).

Approaching the opening, Dave could feel a slight caustic bite in the air. At the entrance, the light from Daffyd's eyebeams revealed a short flight of stairs leading into a large chamber with a high ceiling, a set of stairs leading to dark openings in the other three walls, what looked to be a large pool in the center of the room, and a pair of large skeletal legs attached to large humanoid skeleton holding a large nasty-looking club.  

From HERE - looks like it's sold out...

Said large skeleton (with horns on its skull!) started approaching him as the light panned across it, so Dave retreated, guessing correctly that it was too large to fit through the entrance.

Sharing the news about what he saw, the party discussed several plans, ranging from Roro being sneaky, to throwing Daffyd's head as a distraction (Daffyd was not amused at this plan).  In the end, they decided to tie Daffyd's head to Dack the Boar-Thief's arse, facing backwards, and have the skeleton chase Dack in a circle, while the others raced to the nearest set of stairs.

The plan worked, but to their chagrin (and the DM's joy) the hazard die came up a 1, so the skeletons in the alcoves in the new hallway stepped down and advanced upon the PCs.

Seeing the mail-clad, spear-wielding skeletons, initiative was rolled and the teams tied.  Brother Frank announced his actions first, holding aloft the fuzzy dice of his deity and calling upon Avrae to turn the walking dead.  

It worked! Three of the four skeletons stepped back into their alcoves, while the fourth lunged at Dave, missing him.  Roro stepped through the legs of the front line and swung the cutlass Sierra, missing.  Varda also swung and connected, learning that skeletons only take half-damage from edged weapons in this world.  Brother Frank then stepped up and rolled a natural 20 with his mace, crushing its skull and ending the threat.

The party hesitated, knowing there were skeletons along the hall and a giant one behind them.  Dave picked up the fallen spear before everyone opted to leave well enough alone and move down the hallway into a rectangular chamber notable for having a pillar in each corner, and an open passageway in each wall.

Studying the pillars, the party saw that they were covered with carvings of people in combat and that - after the entire group failed saves - the carvings began moving faster and closer until suddenly, a plate-armored shade with glowing red eyes stepped out of each pillar!

(DM note: PCs may have evacuated bowels and voided bladders, but players made comments about Ringwraiths and minions of the Lich-King were made.  As a veteran DM, I am not one to let such comments go unheeded... - but just not this session.)

The sudden appearance terrified the party, resulting in all of them backing together in the center of the chamber.  Circumstances allowed for Daffyd's light to shine directly upon one, causing it to momentarily disappear!

Bolstered by the result of Daffyd's light making one shade briefly blink out of existence, Dave's player forgot the game's genre, suggesting that the armored shades were merely holograms, and tested his theory by trying to walk past them.  While they moved menacingly closer, they did not engage, so he was able to use Daffyd to make cursory examinations of the other openings, revealing other passages, to include one that appeared to end in a statue - so the group headed that direction, unmolested by the illusions of shades.

With Daffyd harnessed to his torso, Allistar took the lead and off they went to the statue, crossing another passage in the process.  Shining Daffyd's eyes to the north revealed a set of stairs heading up and to the south revealed more corridor.

Thus we ended, around a statue in a dead-end chamber.

-----

Brother Frank was voted MVP for his successful turning of most of the skeletons AND the natural 20 that crushed the skull of the one that didn't turn.

No treasure was discovered (beyond a mundane short-spear), but stairs up were, so escape is now theoretically possible within the next few sessions.

Overall, the group being effectively stuck on the second level means the potential for exploration XP is high - even if they find the shortest route back to the main entrance on level one (and the tax collectors at the top of it).  Presuming they make it back to Skara Brae, some might actually level up.  

Roro's player has been mapping the entire time and it is glorious! Several sheets of notebook paper with nothing to scale - I know the plan is to sell it to Ebeneezer Hardbottle, but until then, it is being used in game and is awesome.  I'm hoping they'll make use of it to determine potential hidden areas.

As an added bonus, if the mapper's PC falls, that map becomes an excellent treasure for the next explorer! Add a mapper to your games - you won't be sorry!

I definitely need to incorporate encumbrance with all the running and carrying heavy things they are up to - and warned the players as much.

At one point, the session became focused on my and Varda's character jointly reciting Jabberwocky, after a rambling story about White Rabbit and drugs (brought on by the pillar-shades appearance being compared to an acid trip), so I am thinking a vorpal blade that goes snicker-snack is kicking around in the dungeon.

Somewhere.

Probably some custom monsters too: the Manxome Foe, the Bandersnatch, the Jub-Jub Bird, and the Jabberwock itself.  Luckily, most of these, if not all, already exist in one form or another, so my homebrewing is limited to merely cherry-picking what I like best from the Google.

Note that the Chesire Cat is more NPC than actual monster and will also be making an appearance - multiples, probably, because recurring NPCs are fun.

As an aside, I'm excited for Andrew Kolb's take on Wonderland, so I can loot it of ideas.    His Oz and Neverland books are excellent, so I have high expectations. It should be available in November, just in time for Christmas!

Speaking of Jabberwocky, here is the Muppets version - which is awesome, and here is a telling (with music) by Omnia, which is also awesome.

Thursday, July 11, 2024

The Staff of Pmurt the Orange

A magic item that came to me as I drove home.  

I promise the write-up for session four is almost done and should hopefully be finished tonight.

------

Pmurt the Orange was an average wizard born to wealthy parents.  His parents' wealth brought him everything but skill at magic, which could only be achieved through patience and practice.  Given that Pmurt lacked patience, it was only a matter of time before a magical experiment went awry, permanently staining his flesh and hair a sickly shade of orange, a shade that cannot be hidden under any magics yet tried - which only served to increase the anger that Pmurt the Orange felt at being born.

With time, however, Pmurt the Orange did master his craft, at least enough to craft a magestaff of some potency.

Unfortunately, the staff picked up some of Pmurt's negative personality traits during its creation and, as such, using the staff can be exhausting.  Indeed, merely attuning to it costs the wielder 1d4+1 temporary Charisma loss, a loss which can only be restored when the wielder gives up the staff.  Getting it to actually work requires the wielder to force their will upon the staff, and the more potent the power, the more exhausting the battle of wills.

Mechanically this means that to activate a power safely requires the wielder to make a Charisma save; failure to make the save means the power is still used, but the wielder acquires one or more levels of exhaustion. 

DC10, 1 level of exhaustion - Light, Dancing Lights, Ventriloquism

DC12, 1 level of exhaustion - Detect Thoughts, Knock 

DC14, 1 level of exhaustion - Suggestion, Charm Person

DC16, 2 levels of exhaustion - Dispel Magic, Wall of Ice

DC18, 3 levels of exhaustion - Confusion, Fear

DC20, 4 levels of exhaustion - Teleport Self (like Teleport, but only the wielder goes)

In addition to the above powers, Pmurt's staff has a pair of unique abilities that only exhaust others:

Fleeting Luck - when this power is active, the wielder rolls all rolls at advantage; the drawback is that one of their local allies (chosen at random or by DM fiat) suffers the opposite, and all of their rolls are at disadvantage.  When active, it lasts for 8 hours before having to be reactivated.

Energy Vampire - the wielder heals themself of damage at the expense of their allies.  When activated, a local ally is chosen at random (or DM fiat), and the wielder is brought up to full hit points.  This ability can even heal some conditions, but not exhaustion.  

These abilities seem harsh, but the truth is that Pmurt the Orange was a narcissist, and cared not at all for his allies beyond what they could do for him in the short-term.

Lastly, using the staff slowly stains its wielder the same ugly orange as Pmurt, beginning with the palms of their hands and spreading outwards, until the body is covered.  Using the more powerful abilities makes the stains spread faster; to date, there is no record of what happens to a wielder who goes completely orange, although it is speculated that this is a form of slow-moving possession, and one that reaches full orange becomes Pmurt himself (and therefore, an NPC).

-----

Note that the Staff is sentient and will activate the Teleport Self if it believes it or its wielder is in danger.  This has the side effect of making the wielder appear to be a coward in the eyes of allies.

Being sentient, it can speak, but chooses not too unless absolutely necessary.  

Tuesday, July 2, 2024

Summer Games, part 3

Three sessions in a row!  2024 is turning into a great gaming year for me.  I even got to play some Magic this Wednesday.

Our cast:

Varda, the Elf

Dave, the Fighter

Roro, the Halfling

Dack, the Thief - currently a swine

Brother Frank, Cleric of Avrae

Land, Cleric of Ikea - rolled and run by Dack's player

Anyhow, we left off last week with Dack turned into a swine and everyone off to meet with Frankie Breakbone, the moneylender.

Frankie Breakbone, courtesy of MtG card Tavern Swindler by Pauline Voss

As might be expected, the conversation ended with our heroes having a month to find the money needed to pay her back.  About 1000gp between Dave, Dack, and Frank.

They also learned that Circe might turn Dack back into a human for a price.  Her price being the recovery of a large gem that she is fairly certain is on the third level of the dungeon - at least her divinations suggest as much.  

Circe the Witch.  Elvira, Mistress of the Dark is an alias.


When does she want it?  Before she sails back to her island in the Aegean Sea in a few months.  With that, she dismissed the party and her guards escorted them out.

Balking at Circe's demand, the party makes use of the I Know a Guy houserule, and Varda introduces the table to Cornelius de Bleu, a wizard who had enough of a crush on her to follow her to Skara Brae and set up shop.  It turns out, he also had an outrageous French accent, kind of a mix between Monty Python and Pepe LePew.  Note that about halfway through, the DM slipped into a bad Antonio Banderas impersonation.  Ah, wizards.

Cornelius was willing to provide an answer out of kindness to his crush.  His researches suggested that if a person were to walk backwards across the Bridge of Broken Souls (item 94 on this table).  Unfortunately, Cornelius wasn't certain where said bridge might actually be - perhaps in the dungeon. (DM Note - it would be funny if it had to be crossed to retrieve the gem Circe wants).

By this point, Dack's player had finished rolling up and equipping Land, Cleric of Ikea, so the party followed Dack the Swine's lead to the temple of Ikea, where it nosed into Land.  After introductions, we learned that Dack had been raised by the temple, but did not jive with their neutral ways.  Still, Land remembered and felt pity for the swine, so offered up that the temple of Ikea had access to the dungeon, and would provide it to its members.

As they prepared for the delve, they discussed the rumors they had heard over the past few days, and I, the DM had each of them roll on d30 rumor table.  They learned the following:

Ebeneezer Hardbottle is still willing to pay for maps.
Tristan's bride-to-be was kidnapped and her dowry stolen by bandits on the first level.
A flaming sword was lost to the orcs on the first level.
A treasure-laden funeral barge floats on a vast reservoir deep down on the tenth level (this was a popular topic, being rolled three times).
The Church of Starry Wisdom keeps a treasure vault on the second level.
Spinning a Wheel destroyed the gossip and their friends.
A pair of ogres named Smash and Grab enjoy ale and mules.
Some folks bathed in a pool and woke up ... different.

Rumors shared and bags packed, they headed down a dark spiral staircase, farther down than they initially thought possible (DM note - all the way to second level) where the air grew cold and still - like see-your-breath cold.

The stairs bottomed out into a 30'x30' chamber with an opening in the center of each wall.  Peering down two of them, they saw nothing but alcoves in the walls and darkness stretching out past their torch and candle light.  Without checking the third opening, Roro the Rash called out "Hello!" down a passage and was rewarded with a distant shuffling and moaning that grew closer and closer until their light revealed a pair of zombies shambling towards them!

The zombies were met with bowstring and steel, but alas! poor Land, Cleric of Ikea, fell to the blows of a zombie! This enraged Dack the pig, and looking in the rules, we found that Boars are listed, and as Dack is a male, we ran with it.

The final zombie fell beneath the furious feet of an enraged Dack-boar! 

And with that, we ended!

BX combat is fatal!






 

Monday, June 17, 2024

Summer Games, part 2

A second session complete!  This log is brought to you by the letter B and Dragon's Milk Stout.

We ended last session with an encounter rolled but unrevealed, so this week we played it out.

Our intrepid band had stepped into the entrance chamber to find that another party had just entered the dungeon themselves.  This was a larger party, led by a knight of Osha, Sir Gerrard Capashen (DM note - the thief named after an MtG character made jokes about my using MtG character names...) who asked the party if they could direct him to a large room with double doors, as Osha himself had sent a vision to Gerrard, questing him to guard that chamber for a full year, and to put down whatever came through those doors.  Honestly telling him that they hadn't found such a chamber, the party moved aside as Sir Gerrard and his party - which included squires, a chaplain, several men-at-arms, some lantern-bearers/linkboys, and a muleskinner and his mule - headed down the way the PCs had come from.

(DM note - this encounter illustrates and reinforces that there are multiple adventurer groups in play, negotiations are often safer than immediate combat, the players can hire help, and that supplies for a prolonged stay might prove useful; in addition, I cannot control when or if the PCs pass through those double doors, but if they do, well...).

Observing that Sir Gerrard's company had left a makeshift ramp on the entry stairs, no doubt to facilitate the mule, Varda declared that counting out the contents of the chest would be a good plan, and the others agreed, so they began counting out the coins in neat stacks of 10.

In the dungeon entrance room.

As might be imagined, this took some time, which meant a roll for an encounter, which came up a 1.

Okay, this is technically a scene from Moria as painted by the late, great, Angus McBride, but the sentiment is the same.

While they were counting, they heard pounding from the far door by the bloodstains.  A thump followed by a clang as the first spike holding the door closed fell to the floor.  A second thump and clang as the second spike fell.  The third thump saw the door fly open and three angry hobgoblins stepped through, armed with wickedly curved scimitars.  

The largest of the three took in the situation, pointed at the party, and called out, "BREE-YARK!" which is goblin for 'time to pay your taxes'! Both Dave and Varda understood them, which influenced their actions.

Our heroes took action at the first thump and clang, with Dave and Roro readying bows, Brother Frank raising his mace and shield and standing next to Dave, Varda standing up from counting and drawing her sword, and Dack bravely moving to the rear - to protect the treasure, no doubt.

By the time the door burst open, our heroes were ready.  At the first call of Bree-Yark, Dave and Roro fired their bows, missing wildly, and the fight was on!  Varda followed up the arrows with a Magic Missile (now her permanent 1st level spell), slaying the first hobgoblin.  The other two hobgoblins passed their morale check and continued the charge.

Face-to-face, the two sides exchanged blows, with an end-state of the hobgoblins being dead - one by Dack's dagger - through the ear! - and the other from an arrow through the eye, courtesy of Roro.  

Realizing the folly of counting coins in the dungeon, the team loaded up sacks, both with the loot from the chest, and the small loot from the hobs, to include a necklace made of silver coins strung on a leather thong, which Varda claimed.  

As the coins were being picked up, it was decided that beheading the corpses and placing the heads in the chest would be a funny prank to play on whomever next opened the chest.  Furthermore, the chest and the bodies would be pushed through the hole in the door where the snake was believed to lurk.

They tasked Brother Frank to do the beheading, to which he exclaimed "clerics cannot wield edged weapons - it says so in the holy book!" and then he pulled out thin tome with red leather covers, and an image embossed on the front of what appeared to be a wizard and fighter battling a dragon of some sort.

While Brother Frank showed his work, Dack filled the chest with heads.

(DM note - During this entire first hour, I asked at least multiple times specifically about the chest.  At no time did anyone search it for a false bottom or false top.  Their loss.)

They began to move the bodies through the door when a slithering sound was heard beyond it.  Presuming it to be a giant snake, our heroes opted to head back to sunlight and safety!

At the top of the stairs waited Sergeant Bruno of the guard, his men-at-arms, and the magic-user/scribe Halaster.  Guards began exchanging money, and the party learned that bets are made about various dungeoneers' survival, and having heard the fight below, the bets ran high - against the party.

The PCs also learned that in addition to an entrance fee, there is a tax on found treasure.  After a tense moment and words with Bruno, Varda grudgingly handed over the coin necklace as payment for the group and team headed off to the Green Dragon to spend their filthy lucre. 

Hopefully the rumors about other entrances are true.

-----

Safely aboveground, it was time to divvy up the treasure, and more importantly, the XP.  After math, each PC received 454 xp, with additional amounts of 5% or 10% going to some for high prime requisites. 

The total cash value was 30gp per PC (mostly silver in that chest).  Enough for a few days of careful living.  Or a blowout party.

I then introduced the group to proper carousing rules, ala' Jeff's Gameblog.  From experience, though, I have scaled down the "fire" option, because I enjoy having a city not in ashes.  That said, here is what carousing brought them:

Only Dave, Dack, and Brother Frank opted to go carousing.  Being more dignified than their human companions, Roro and Varda found a full-service spa.

Dave rolled a 2 and failed his poison save, becoming known as the life of the party here in Skara Brae, which means all his future carousing rolls cost twice as much.

Dack rolled a 5 and also failed his poison save, and it seems that while drunk, he made lewd advances towards a witch, who turned him into a swine.  (DM note - I am guessing it was Circe out slumming, having tired of her island home in the Aegean Sea).

Brother Frank rolled a 6, but made his poison save.  Praise Avrae!

None of the three had enough cash for the die rolls, so now all three owe money, conveniently from the same person...

In the morning, a messenger from Frankie Breakbone was waiting for them.  "Now that you're all awake, my boss, Ms. Breakbone, wants to have a word with you.  Given that she loaned you three money, she expects you after breakfast.  I'll wait."

Varda and Dack both recognized her name from their dealings with the underworld

And that is where we left off: 4 bipeds and a quadruped (on a leash) being escorted to meet with one Frankie Breakbone, loanshark, businesswoman, and all-around not nice gal.

At the end of the session, it was determined that Dack was the MVP, so received a bonus 250xp award.  As a thief, Dack is close to leveling up - provided he can become un-swined. 

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Yes, the principal deities this time round are Osha, God of Law; Ikea, Divinity of Neutrality; and Avrae, Goddess of Chaos.

Perhaps this game takes place in the far distant future of our world, but not quite Dying Earth distant.

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Bonus news! As a Father's Day gift, I received this from my eldest.  It's only a matter of time before the PCs run into it...  I promise I am not lifting ideas directly from Delicious in Dungeon.

Gargantuan Red Dragon

But only after its painted.  Luckily, I know a guy.