Saturday, October 23, 2021

Crowdsourcing Faith

The other day, in my post about using College Football Teams as the basis for Cleric religions, I half-joked about the new deities Avrae and Ikea, then hit FB to crowdsource more in that vein.  As can be imagined, it was a popular topic in both groups I posted in (Dungeon Master Resources and D&D DMs Only).


So thank you to all that participated, to include the honest individual stating that they would avoid a game that used such deities.

One of the responses sent me to a pair of blog posts by the Angry GM: Conflicted Beliefs: Building a Perfect Five God Mythology for D&D | The Angry GM and Conflicted Beliefs: Fluffy Story Bulls$&% | The Angry GM.  Both are worth reading if you’re serious about building your own pantheon.

A few kind folks shared their homemade pantheons, and one even went so far as to provide some creation myths and necessary domains.  While I was initially planning to politely ignore the bit about domains, it occurred to me that having them allows me to focus my researches.

When it is all said and done, several recurring themes appeared: Disney, Uber and Lyft, and Amazon.  Between this and my recent perusal of the game iHunt, I hit upon the following plan: to make full use of the panoply of apps out there and to avoid the easy pickings of using political figures/policies in the main pantheon (although it can be easily argued that such figures would be saints and champions of various deities).

Typing this up, I realize that it is American-centric.  It happens.

I present to you the Meme Pantheon.   Clerics (and others) praying to these deities first reach a Cosmic Call Center, where they are put through to the proper extension.  Clerics with some levels already know the proper extensions. There is but one holy set of scriptures, contained within the Book of Faces.  Each temple holds a copy of the Book of Faces, and the (not-so-)faithful carry a copy with them.

Holy Symbols of each faith are the brand symbols, worn on chains and/or tattooed to body parts.

Alexa - Goddess of Servants

Amazon - a demigod of delivery and messages and couriers 

Avrae - Goddess of Chance

BigBox - known variously as WalMart, Target, and other names; once known as KMart, but that aspect died in the godswar.

Bowie - genderless Deity of Change and Music

Caffeine - God of Inspiration and Relief

Contractor - God of War and Ill-Gotten Gains

Covid - God of Disease, Fear, and Ignorance

Discord - God of Communication

Disney - God of Illusion, Entertainment

Dyson - God of Winds and Cartographers

Emoji - Deity of Symbolism and Misunderstandings

Evian - Goddess of Water

Gig - God of Short-term Jobs; favored by adventurers and mercenaries

Ikea - Goddess of Creation

Kellogg - God of the Harvest and Grain, attended by three faithful servants named Snap, Crackle, and Pop

Montsanto - God of deceit, greed, and the destruction of nature

Nestle - God of Drought, Rain, and Chocolate

Nicotine - Goddess of Diets, Appearance, and Anxiety

Petroleum - God of Energy (slowly dying as he is worshipped more and more)

Propaganda - Goddess of Truth

Twitter - Goddess of the People

Uber and Lyft - sibling demigods of travel, transit, and pilgrimages

Viagra - Goddess of Insecurity, Fertility, and ; loyally served by Tindr, Grindr, Zoosk, Eharmony, and others.

WHO - God of Healing

Wikipedia - Goddess of Information and Rumor

Zippo – God of Fire

Of course, the list can be refined, both with names and which domains they represent.  Still, I think it can be fun, and at least some will find their way into my homebrew world.  If I get to play a cleric and am offered the opportunity to choose my own religion, it is bound to be one of these (because Ecnep, Voice of Pmurt the Orange has been played and died by sentient pumpkin.  I'm not even lying.)



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